Sunday, September 21, 2008

Illegal Snacks

The sidebar of my Pass It On Plates blog has a list of other blogs I read regularly. I have gotten to know several of the authors, whom I now refer to as my "Invisible Friends." One of my invisible friends is Laurie Beth Beggin, a talented and kind stained glass artist; I check her blog daily for updates.

Today Laurie B posted about another of her own invisible friends, Keri Joy Coles, an artist who makes colorful funky polymer dolls. I hopped over to Keri's blog and fell in love with her writing and her art.

As I read post after post on Keri's blog, I came across a silly one about Kotex slippers.

This post is hilarious. Frank walked into the room as I read about the 3 sizes and I had just closed my eyes and shook my head. He walked over to see what I was reading and so I showed him. He blanched.

You see, we've had a little problem at home that started when Rachel left to spend 7 weeks at G-ma and G-pa's farm in Wisconsin. She told Caesar where she was going and we left a pair of pajamas that she had worn on her bed so Caesar could smell her. We also waited to change her bed until just before she came home so her smell would be there as well.

Caesar still missed her terribly. We know because he started to dig into the bathroom trash while we were at work. Frank is always the first one to come home, and he would open the front door to see half-chewed Q-Tips on the floor of the hallway between the front door and the bathroom door. (Our apartment layout stinks. The front door opens directly into the laundry area and your first view is across the hall into the bathroom, where you clearly see the toilet and shower curtain. Tacky. Very un-Feng Shui. *Sign* I can't wait to move... next week. But I digress.)

Caesar also paraded underwear around the house. Clean, waiting to be folded and put away or dirty - I don't know. I didn't check. I just threw them back in the hamper when I discovered them.

(Warning: this is a little gross. You can stop reading now if you are squeamish...or male.)
Last week when I was in Los Angeles, Caesar must have missed me because he started digging through the trash again. Only this time he found some very "illegal snacks" to shred. We learned very quickly that the bathroom door needed to be closed at all times. If not, there would be a mess to clean up (we have quickly been going through our box of disposable gloves) and a section of carpet to shampoo, just in case. You know.

Yes, we do take out the trash but sometimes there are items sitting in the trash can...

Even after I've returned home, Caesar is still drawn to the bathroom, so we have been trained to shut the bathroom door when we leave and overnight. Unfortunately, we are not consistent, and two days ago Frank came home from a grueling 13-hour day at work to discover more illegal snacks shredded all over the hallway and into the living room. Poor Frank had to clean it up. He was NOT in the mood.

This explains why he blanched when I showed him the last line about the three sizes in the Kotex Slippers post. After Caesar's recent snacking spree, I'm sure if I make pair of those, the dog will leave the rest of our shoes alone...

I think some extra long overnights would make a nice pair of slippers for Frank, too.

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